Gym Closed For One Night: The Great Sock Incident

On Tuesday night the Gym will be closed for investigation. At 3:44 last week a single sock was discovered on the track. It was not ours. It smelled of unfamiliar feet and mild regret. Nobody knows how it got there, though Private Noodle has been sweating in a manner I find suspicious.

An inquiry has been convened. Corporal Pickle will interview witnesses. The sock will be held in the evidence bowl under the radiator until further notice. Memberships will be extended by one night, which for a cat is about eleven seconds of attention. If you know anything about the sock, report to me immediately. Do not hug it. It is evidence.